sunday morning

i just woke up and it's 7:15 in london. outside.. well, it looks like london. it's not raining, but only just .. the sky is gray, and the streets are relatively quiet. i'm watching the news and trying to figure out if i'm really going to be able to stick it out here until july .. .and, if so, how i'm going to manage another whole month after that in paris. i know.. rough life; you poor girl; etc. ... i know i can't make any decisions right now, because once school starts, things will be different; i won't feel so alone.. but i was on the tube yesterday, and this american woman was talking loudly enough for everyone in our particular car to hear, about how when she was in okechobee after the hurricane the mosquitoes were as big as hummingbirds and they all carried west nile and heartworm and it's a wonder her poor dog didn't get infected and every month she gives him heartworm tablets and gets him tested yearly and she was just bit by a mosquito in london and wouldn't that be ironic if she survived the mega-mosquitoes in florida only to come to london and be infected with west nile virus and i seriously wanted to fucking hit her because honestly, who fucking cares? ... then i was in burger king and this american girl was all appalled when they told her she had to pay for barbecue sauce and i realized that i fucking hate americans, particularly americans abroad, and last time i had to go to school here with a whole bunch of them at least i had will and i didn't have to spend all that much time with anyone else.. but this time, it's just me, and there's no telling what the people who show up at school will be like. maybe they'll be great.... but maybe they won't.. and i don't have nearly as much patience as i used to for dealing with stupidity, be it mine or anyone else's.